I envision a world where women feel utterly empowered to dream big, speak boldly, and live radiantly.
As an Authentic Communication Coach, I help women put their truth into action by setting clear boundaries and speaking their truth in relationships with friends, family, colleagues, and lovers.
Boundary-setting and authentic communication has been my life’s work. I still have the journal entry that sparked my journey. It says, in striking black pen, “I wish I could speak my truth. If I can learn to speak my truth before I die, I will die a happy woman.” I’d written it the day after I’d been the recipient of unwanted advances at a bar. A stranger had engaged me in aggressive conversation, peppering in flirtation and slipping his bony hand around my waist. For 30 minutes I’d tolerated his behavior with a fake smile before escaping to the bathroom.
I knew that throughout the experience, all I needed to do was say, “Thank you, but I’m not interested. ’’ But, as often used to happen, I couldn’t speak up for myself. I’d waited in silence, hoping the man would mind-read my discomfort and give me space. The next morning, I took my pen and articulated what I saw as my Great Frontier in life: setting boundaries, communicating authentically, and heeding the needs of my inner self.
This challenge presented in all areas of my life. My tendency to people-please led to a sense of imbalance in relationships with friends, lovers, and colleagues. Sometimes, it manifested as mildly as staying too long in a conversation that bored me, or offering to help a friend when I didn’t have the time. Sometimes it was as extreme as sleeping with someone I didn’t want to sleep with because I didn’t want to “hurt his feelings.”
I was constantly betraying myself, constantly designing my life around others’ desires. The result was a life that felt mediocre, underwhelming, and not quite my own.
Everything changed when I went through a challenging break-up and awoke to the reality that I’d always been the sole person responsible for my own happiness. In my relationship I’d become amorphous, molding to my perceived expectations of my partner and friends. Now, single and suddenly without a sense of identity, I realized that this was my chance to develop a nurturing, supportive relationship with my inner self: the woman beneath the performing and the people-pleasing. For the first time, I made a commitment to put my truth into action.
It started slowly. As weeks passed, I turned down invitations to parties, declined uninspiring work opportunities, and quit extracurricular activities that no longer aligned with my interests. Bit by bit, as if supported by a pair of training wheels, I made the decisions that felt right for me. As I set these new boundaries, I watched as my friends didn’t judge me, my lovers didn’t leave me, and my world didn’t crumble. As a matter of fact, I felt empowered, strong, and deeply right.
Suddenly, being the one responsible for my own happiness felt empowering. And as I got better at saying no to the things that didn’t excite me, I began to say yes to the things that did.
With a blank slate before me and a renewed sense of self-trust, I began to design my own vision for my work, relationships, and lifestyle. Since then, communicating authentically has enabled me to:
Explore nourishing, communicative romantic connections that thrill and excite me
Heal childhood hurts and develop honest, compassionate relationships with family members
Follow my intuition across the country to call a new city home
Rediscover my creative voice by writing music and poetry
Commit to a sober lifestyle and become part of a thriving sober community
Surround myself with inspiring, clever, thoughtful women who serve as role models and friends
The journey of authentic communication is never-ending. I continue to embrace it, challenges and all, at every turn, because it is my favorite way of existing in this complex world. Instead of constantly choosing how to act or what to say, there is always one choice: my truth. It is the compass that guides me during the most exciting and challenging of times.
I’m thrilled to have the privilege and opportunity to help other women put their truth into action.
Certified by Erickson Coaching International, I have helped over 100 women throughout the United States and Canada put their truth into action. My writing has been published on Tiny Buddha, Elephant Journal, Having Time, and more. As the founder and owner of Talisman Music Group, a career coaching group that has provided support to over 150 emerging musicians, I have a long history of supporting clients as they transform their lives and pursue their deepest passions.
I’m currently accepting new clients. If you’re inspired by the ways you might benefit from Authentic Communication Coaching, sign up for a complimentary, 30-minute consultation here to see if we would make a good fit for a coaching partnership.